92Y – Jonathan Santlofer in Conversation with Joyce Carol Oates

Explore the power of love, the pain of loss and the experience of moving forward with writer Joyce Carol Oates and writer and artist Jonathan Santlofer, as they discuss their work and the art of the memoir. After losing his wife, tragically and unexpectedly, Santlofer embarked on a journey of grief and self-discovery that he chronicles in his poignant new book, The Widower’s Notebook. Join him and celebrated author Joyce Carol Oates, who wrote her own memoir, A Widow’s Story, when they sit down for a heartfelt, inspiring conversation. “It is such an achievement, like running uphill against a strong wind,” says Oates of Santlofer’s book. Pulitzer Prize winning author Michael Cunningham has called The Widower’s Notebook “A true tragic beauty.” Come learn how we can all run uphill in life’s most difficult moments. Click here for more info

The Art of The Widower’s Notebook

After my wife, Joy’s, sudden death I hid all of the photographs – it was too painful for me to have them around, particularly to come upon them unexpectedly. I needed to be prepared, in control, and drawing provided that. I started drawing a few weeks after Joy’s death. It was a way to stay close but have distance at the same time. I made lots of drawings, not all of them in the book (my publisher and I chose about a dozen for inclusion), and not all of them are here. Some were very quick sketches, others very complete in my typical trompe l’oeil (trick of the eye) style where I have drawn in tape and tears to make the drawings look “real.” There is a chapter in the book about drawing, how I started, and how it helped me move forward.

Praise for The Widower’s Notebook

“The Widower’s Notebook is a searing rendition of the complex relationship between men and grief—an intense despair that is too often starved for words. This chronicle of devastation is itself devastating, a deeply powerful and unflinchingly honest report of how painfully and strangely life continues in the wake of a sudden, tragic death.” -Andrew Solomon, bestselling author of Far From the Tree “The Widower’s Notebook, Jonathan Santlofer’s searingly truthful chronicle of mortality, is, among its wonders, a book about the preciousness of life and love, rendered all the more heart-wrenching, and all the more vital, by a loss almost beyond imagining. It’s a true tragic beauty.” -Michael Cunningham, Pulitzer prize winner and multi-award winning author of The Hours “Deeply moving . . . beautifully written . . . It is such an achievement, like running uphill against a strong wind.” —Joyce Carol Oates, National Book Award winning author “Wrenching, heartbreaking, intense and emotional—but valuable, too: … Read more

The Library Journal Reviews The Widower’s Notebook

    “Nero Award winner whose debut novel, The Death Artist, was an international best seller and an artist whose works grace major collections (e.g., the Metropolitan Museum of Art), Santlofer writes about the shock of his wife’s sudden, unexpected death and his inability to admit his pain to anyone, including himself.” –The Library Journal Read more here…

Food City

As most of you know, my wife, Joy, died suddenly and unexpectedly two years ago. At the time, she was close to finishing her 5-year book project, Food City: 400 Centuries of Food Making in New York. This epic, history-changing book is scheduled for release by WW Norton in June 2015 but there are still many things to be completed. Doria took it upon herself to create a Food City Kickstarter Campaign that is both pragmatic and a loving tribute to her mother. I know how hard she worked on this and how difficult it was emotionally. I hope you don’t mind that I offered your contact info to Doria. Of course you should not feel in any way compelled to donate, but we would appreciate it if you pass along the link so the word can spread. This is an important book, Joy’s life’s work, and we are making sure it gets the attention it deserves.